Jesus Sees Us

“How do you know me?” Nathanael asked.

Jesus answered, “I saw you while you were still under the fig tree before Philip called you.”

- John 1:48

I’ve been reading through the Gospels on my own for a month or two now. It’s always crazy how whenever I read my Bible I find something new. I don’t find it coincidental that in whatever season I’m in during my life’s journeys, what I find while I read always fits what I’m going through, and always has a way of speaking into that. In this season of hardship, sorrow, grief, loss and what I hope will turn into new growth, I’ve come to realize that what I’ve been needing so badly is the reminder that Jesus sees me, and it’s a deeply personal connection — and that realization didn’t occur to me until last night as I started reading the book of John.

This is the exact moment all of this hit me — I got to John 1:47-49. I’ve read this several times throughout my life. I’ve even see it depicted in one of my favorite shows. But for whatever reason, in this moment while reading, something clicked for me. Now, I personally don’t know much about Nathanael and I did some research and I don’t think there’s a whole lot known about his situation or how he got under that fig tree, what he was doing there, or why Jesus would choose to point out this particular moment. But I do know this: that moment between Nathanael and Jesus was personal. To me, it even seems like Jesus never actually physically saw him with his eyes before this moment; it was more of a “God saw you/I saw you while you were alone” kind of thing. Whatever it was that Nathanael was doing under the fig tree, even if he was just resting in the shade, that moment was significant and personal enough for Nathanael to immediately understand Jesus was the Messiah and know He saw him.

I paused, and I was overcome with the feeling like I was going to ugly cry. You might be thinking “what in the world?! What in that verse could possibly move anyone to tears?” But it’s been a really hard season and I couldn’t help thinking of my own “fig tree moments”… moments when I thought I was alone and unseen.

Moments like:

While I saw that these church doors were open and it was empty, and I slipped into the back pew. Seeing it’s beauty and feeling all of my big hurts welling up, I let out a heavy sigh.

Jesus saw me.

While I sat in my closet floor sobbing and praying, scared and not knowing what the future held.

Jesus saw me.

While I was mistreated, weary, and angry, and felt like nothing will ever change.

Jesus saw me.

While I hit “publish” on my website page with the biggest smile on my face, and I finally shared it with the world.

Jesus saw me.

While I sat on my porch while my daughter napped, just hanging out and trying to enjoy some warm weather.

Jesus saw me.

You get the picture. And I know you have your own moments like that too. As I sat there remembering them, I thought about Jesus speaking to me like He did to Nathanael but using my name, saying: “I saw you, Rachel, while you were _____.” In times of sadness, in times of joy, and everything in between — I saw you.

How beautiful. How personal.

Sometimes while I am so busy living my life and wading through my own emotions, I tend to see Jesus as only a reverent authority figure I look to in the heavens when I’m at my wits end. I pray, I read my Bible, I go to church on Sunday and I seek Him, but it is so easy to forget that while Jesus is magnificent, awesome, wonderful and mighty… He sees me on a personal level. I’m willing to bet you need that too. You need to know that Jesus sees you, and it’s not a superficial thing — it’s personal — just you and Jesus. “I saw you while you were still under the fig tree…”

Think about some of your own moments as if Jesus is speaking to you — “I saw you while you were ____.”

Doesn’t that hit you right in the soul? Doesn’t that make you breathe in the biggest breath of comfort and solace?

Just like Nathanael all those years ago, we are also seen by the Messiah, and we can find peace in this fact when we feel alone, when we feel unseen or ignored, or even when we feel joy. No matter where you are, no matter what is going on.

We are seen while we sit under the fig tree.